Louis, Carrie, Kaleen and Nova of The Amputees

Two years ago, I decided to say hello to three new people every day for a month. One of those people was Carrie of The Amputees. When I mentioned I was seeking a guitar teacher for my daughter, she suggested her husband, Louis Ramos, who soon incorporated my daughter, Nova, into the band.

Louis said the formation of the band was “like a weird series of events. A guy upstairs gave me an 8 track-recording machine and my father in law gave me a guitar. It was beyond my control. It just happened.”

“When Nova came for lessons, I knew she could sing,” said Louis. “I wrote these songs around what I thought her voice would sound like. As soon as she opened her mouth it was perfect with the songs. I thought she’d be perfect with the band.”

“Then when I met Kaleen and I saw her play with Misstallica,” said Louis, “at one point she got so excited that she stood up while she was playing and I thought, wow, she should be in my band.”

The Amputees bandmembers are Louis Ramos, Carrie Ramos, Kaleen Reading, Geena Spigarelli, Gary Young and Nova. John Meredith of the Mollusk Studio has helped bring the music to life in their recording sessions.

Cover Art for Scream by Marissa Paternoster of Screaming Females

“Everybody who I want in the band is in it,” said Louis. “And Marissa Paternoster from Screaming Females is doing the art for the upcoming 7 inch “Scream” which is amazing cause we’re all big fans.”

Although The Amputees are featured on a Garage Punk website, their music is not easy to define by genre.

“It’s punk in essence because it’s kind of do what you want,” said Nova.

The Amputees’ upcoming 7-inch record, Scream, boasts five rock songs, ranging from the frenetic King Jubs through the rollicking Beaner about bassist Geena, and the haunting Holden, which was inspired by Catcher in the Rye.

“At the very end of the book, Holden says you better not tell anyone anything because when you tell people things you’ll start to miss them,” Nova said. “That’s why I say at the end of the song, “If I tell you I’ll miss you.””

The Amputees have 400 followers on Facebook, although Louis claims that not all of them are fans.

“Some are fake,” he said. “Prosthetic limb factories and amputee fetish people.”

Some people have criticized the band’s name and some of their lyrics and images.

“I got accused of having a bad message,” said Louis. “When I put up the video of Commence the Slaughter, somebody wrote to me and said this is vile which I thought was a great comment.”

Louis Ramos, Gary Young, Geena Spigarelli, Carrie Ramos, Kaleen Reading and Nova

“The best part for me is that the people in the band are my closest friends,” said Louis. “Music is what started it, but it’s gone beyond music.”

The Amputees next concert is Kaleen’s birthday bash at Don Pedro’s on March 23rd. All are welcome.

Some people enjoy public speaking. I would like to be one of those people. I’ve had moments during public readings or radio interviews when my heart beat so fast I could hardly breathe. I had a television audition during which my mouth became so dry that I couldn’t separate my tongue from the roof of my mouth.

I learned about Toastmasters from Mike Dooley’s book, Manifesting Change. Dooley’s first Toastmaster speech was on the topic, “Thoughts Become Things.” He is now a professional public speaker.

I went to my first Toastmasters meeting last Wednesday, along with several other first-timers, most of them students at nearby Columbia University.

Presiding Officer, Vic asked all the guests to introduce themselves. Then Toastmaster, Carole, introduced the word of the day: motivation. Next, two speakers presented speeches.

Thomas talking on the Year of the Snake

Thomas, a Toastmasters regular, gave the first speech, “Happy Year of the Snake.” He used the floor space and aisle, asking listeners, “What do you associate with the snake?” Thomas explained that the lunar New Year means a lot more to him than January 1^st. He said the snake is good for money and flexible so we could expect a good year of change and financial fortune.

Vic talking on Privilege and ResponsibilityNext, Vic spoke on the topic, “With Privilege Comes Responsibility.” Vic recounted his defining moment, when as a child in India his bicycle broke down on the way to school and a young boy helped him fix it. The boy said proudly, “My elder brother goes to school.” This boy was working in a garage to help his brother study. Vic realized then how privileged he was and determined to use his gifts to help others.

Next came a section called “Table Topics” during which Vice President and Topics Master, Rory, called on attendees to speak for two minutes or less on various topics, including the Superbowl electrical malfunction, whether the New York Times should continue in print, whether St. John the Divine Cathedral should sell abutting land for tower blocks, and whether many children or a single child is better in a family.

Me talking about Wine Pairings

I was asked to speak about what I would choose if I were on an important business meeting and asked to select a wine to accompany fish. My knowledge of wines is so poor that I admitted I would have to request assistance from someone in the know.

After an anonymous vote, prize bookmarks were awarded to Vic for Best Speech, newcomer, Nora, for her 46-second Table Topics answer to the family size question, and Thomas for best evaluator.

All speeches are timed and measured by an Ah Counter for the number of sounds used as a crutch. I expected my Ah Counter to be off the charts, but it was zero. Toastmasters is such a relaxed environment in which to learn confidence in public speaking, I’m actually looking forward to giving my first speech.