Cash drew a rectangle at the bottom of a sheet of paper. “This is where I am,“ he said. “I’ve done nothing in my life. Sometimes after I rehearse, I feel like I’ve wasted two hours because my singing sucked. I might never accomplish my dreams.”
“Wow, that is heavy,” I said. “Did anything good happen recently?”
“I had sex without being intoxicated,” said Cash. “And it was fantastic.”
“Congratulations,” I said. “But how did it happen? You just decided to do it and then it happened?”
“I went to the bath house,” he said.
“How does that work?” I asked. “You go in, see someone you like and then your eyes meet?”
“You have a room,” said Cash. “Or they have a room. Then you walk around and catch someone’s eye and one of you says do you have a room.”
“But what if you get to the room and then you change your mind?” I ask.
“That’s the awkward part,” said Cash. “Usually you say I’m taking a break and then you never come back.”
“Where is the bath house?” I asked. “Do they have saunas and stuff?”
“No," said Cash. "And you can’t go. Because you have breasts.”
“I wonder what a straight bathhouse would be like,” I said.
“I’ve thought of making one,” said Cash. “I’d make a fortune.”
Then I thought about a straight bathhouse and all I could imagine was a room full of people catching eyes and then looking away and doing nothing. Many straight men fear rejection and most straight women prefer the man to make the first move. Also the whole courtship thing takes a bit longer; at least it’s more fun when it does.
Having ventured into the arenas of internet dating, speed dating and meeting people around town, I have been surprised at the number of men who expect me to jump into intimate scenarios with them before I’ve had a chance to feel any attraction for them. Sadly, this seems just as prevalent among men who are in relationships. Many American males seem to base their idea of women on media images, porn and the fact that females are apt to mold their behavior to please men.
I know many happily committed couples, both straight and gay, and I believe that romance and passion can coexist. But when it doesn’t, I sometimes wonder about the benefits of Cash’s free and easy style of connecting. He doesn’t want a relationship. For him, sex is just fun and a release of energy. Of course, I still think he wants to fall in love like anyone else. But that’s just me.